Ever have one of those days when regardless of the tool you pull out of your spiritual toolbox, you just can’t pull yourself out of a frenzy?
You try not to be judgmental. You try not to scream. You try not to be just plain pissed off at the state of the world. You know this kind of day?
No matter how hard you work, embracing the possibility that “it’s all good” (my favorite mantra) seems almost impossible?
Today has been one of those days for me.
Today hundreds of trees were destroyed across the street from our house as developers clear-cut a large lot of land where years ago we’d walk with our children down to a stream. I’m sure many animals lost their lives and I suspect more will die as their homes have been demolished.
(I could post a photo, but that would emphasize the pain and there really is a positive message buried beneath the rubble of roots, trunks, leaves and the upheaval of dirt. It’s taken me all day to unearth it, but it’s there – I promise!)
Every time I heard the thump of a tree tumbling to the ground, I felt as though a part of me died, like my heart had been torn in two. I felt lost as I tried to process this event and apply what I’ve learned from my angels to the horror before my eyes.
How can I not judge? There’s no reason to clear-cut other than that it’s more expensive to build if you leave some trees.
Why does this upset me so? I’m sure trees were cut down when our house was built many years ago. Am I being hypocritical?
In a plea to my angels to bring me back to center, I went for a walk in the woods behind our house to commune with other tree friends. There were two messages I received…
First, as my favorite Mama Tree explained, we all take from Mother Earth. All of us. We eat her food, we use her oil, we live on her land and rely on her resources. We can do our best to lessen our “footprint,” but it can’t be eliminated. We need to forgive ourselves for guilt associated with this truth and understand we’re all part of one living, breathing eco-system that is designed to support life, including ours.
And, we must give back more than we take.
We can intend – with our angels – to do more good than harm.
We can go about our daily lives blessing all that we encounter and make choices in alignment with our angels guidance, in alignment with love.
As I returned, the second message came clear when I saw the newly open area with a more healed heart.
What I saw was a lot of light.
What I saw was our neighbor’s little girl playing in her yard and heard her joyous laughter. I then envisioned the beautiful little boys and girls playing in their new yards, happily running, jumping and swinging – from new trees.
I felt an immense release as I realized in a very tangible way that removing obstacles to create space for new beginnings can be hugely painful. It can feel like you’re cutting into flesh to remove a part of who you are – but it’s a part that no longer serves.
While I would have preferred that there had been some kind of organized prayer event to bless the trees before ripping them out of the earth, I’m moving into an acceptance that this is a profound message about the process of space clearing. A topic I’ve known and worked with for eons, but somehow discovered at a new depth today.
It can hurt.
It can tear at your heart as your life changes at a pace you can’t control.
It can smack with the kind of pain that makes you want to holler at the top of your lungs.
Doesn’t this sound a bit like the process of birthing?!
I’m still healing my heart about today’s events and I feel a million times better as the angels have helped me gain insight and perspective.
We must join together and give more than we take so that we may achieve the kind of balance and compassionate world we see in our prayers. We must strive to focus on the positive to stay balanced in joy.
My husband walked in the door, smiled shyly and said, “Well, you can see the sunset better!” ;-)…